Customs

Years ago I was going to a baseball game with my mother, her boss and her boss' young son (about 8 years old). I was about 23 at the time and still living with my parents while I was in graduate school. We picked up my mom's boss and her kid at their house and when we got there my mother introduced me, since I had never met them before. Both the boss (who was female) and the son hugged me after introductions. This was extremely awkward for me. I am a semi-reserved person and I usually only hug close family members (parents, sister, grandparents, aunts and now the super-awkward hug of my mother-in-law and the half handshake/half hug of my father-in-law). I was not accustomed to hugging people I had just met (although the slight humping motion by mom's boss was nice).

Later, my mom told me that this woman was a serial hugger. That it was the custom of her family to hug people in those situations. I find this offensive. The hug itself, while awkward, isn't the problem, it is the assumption that I would be okay with being hugged. Invading someone's personal space and touching them after you have just met them can be seen as extremely rude and these people act as though they have a get-out-of-jail-free card because of "custom". Well what if it was my custom to whip my dick out and piss all over people after I've been introduced to them? I bet they'd be upset, then, right? But hey, don't get mad at me, it's just customary in my family to urinate on a new aquaintance's leg.

Now, I'm not suggesting that acting according to custom when you are out of your normal element is always a bad thing. If you are travelling abroad, you should definitely follow the "When in Rome" line of thinking. If you go to Iraq it is probably a good idea for women to wear the appropriate clothing for that country. If you go to England you should probably drive on the left side of the road. If you go to France you should definitely act like an arrogant prick that hates Americans*.

*As an aside (and to make up for a pretty weak joke about French stereotypes), I wish Americans would stop using WWII as our excuse for being dicks to the French. Yes, if we didn't help out France and England in WWII, they might be speaking German there now - how clever. Remember, though, if France didn't help us out in the Revolutionary War, we might still be speaking English... umm, I mean, we might still be English colonies.

However, I wasn't visiting a foreign country - we had just driven across town. It is not customary in this city, state, region, country or continent to hug someone that you've just met. Customs are fine and good, but don't assume that everyone else wants to take part in your custom. Keep that shit to yourself.

The Old Reliable

When you don't have anything to say, just link to someone else. I thought this was funny.